A Take on Living a Fulfilling Life
Photo by Dave Hoefler on Unsplash
I’m about to turn 30 and I realize that although my life hasn’t turned out exactly how I had hoped (the 20-year-old me envisioned that I would have had more than $2 million in my brokerage account and being only 5 years away from retirement at the age of 30) I am satisfied and grateful for my life. I am thankful for who and what I have in my life, and I feel a sense of enjoyment and fulfillment.
I’m still on this journey so I’m not claiming to have everything figured out, but the frameworks I’ve adopted have helped me thus far. The first framework is called “Ikigai”, a Japanese concept that translates to “reason for being”, and the second framework is called “regret minimization.”
In this post, I will go over these two frameworks.
Ikigai
The image above is a simplification of the Japanese concept of Ikigai. To find a happy and fulfilling life we need to be able to find some activity, or activities, that we love doing, provide value to the world and others, offer us a sustainable income, and that we can excel at. These 4 regions are the needs we need to feel like we are living a fulfilling and meaningful life.
I think it’s a very Western belief that our jobs and our careers need to satisfy all 4 of these regions. Although some of us are lucky to be doing something that is at the intersection of these 4 regions; a job that we are great at, that we love doing, that provides us great income, and that helps the world; others need to find other avenues, such as hobbies, side hustles, or volunteering activities, to get the same satisfaction in life.
Region 1 – “What you love doing”
This first region centers around activities you “love” doing; activities you can do for hours without getting bored. When we do these things we lose track of time because we are so engaged in the activity. Something we look forward to doing every day.
For me, activities that fall into this bucket are:
- Spending time with my family and loved ones
- Gardening
- Reading and writing
- Building stuff
- Strength training
- Playing video games
- Traveling
- Hiking
What we love to do may also change with time, circumstance, or context. For example, if you loved gardening but then had to do it as a means of earning money, it could no longer provide you with the same joy as it once did. If you loved gardening as a means to experiment and be in nature, having to do it for work may introduce certain restrictions that remove the essence of why you loved gardening in the first place.
Another example is that if you have a child and now you love spending time with them, your love for gardening may be replaced.
Region 2 – “What the world needs”
This region encompasses activities that benefit other living beings. They make you feel like you are helping society and giving back to the world.
Region 3 – “What can generate income”
Activities in this region can bring you income and fulfill your monetary and material needs. Any activity can generate income as long as we can find another person or entity that is willing to give us money in exchange for performing that activity.
Region 4 – “What you are good at”
Activities that you could perform better than average and a level where you can teach others would fall into this category.
The Center
The center region is finding something to do that fulfills the needs of regions 1 thru regions 4, however, it’s not necessary that only one activity needs to fulfill all 4 regions. There’s only one person that I know personally that has done this and it’s my sister; she’s currently practicing medicine as a resident physician and she describes that her job is something that she loves doing, that she is good at, that provides her a great income, and that allows her to help others.
However, even she admits that if she had more free time and didn’t need to worry about money, she would just spend more time with her friends and family. She also mentions that there are aspects of her job that she doesn’t love and that there are also other activities that she loves more and allow her to feel like she is giving more back to society.
Personally, I think it’s very difficult to find a single job that fulfills all 4 categories. This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t try; the saying often goes that if “you find a job that you love and you’re good at, you will never work a day in your life.” However, we shouldn’t feel unsatisfied because our jobs don’t fulfill all of our needs or all 4 categories. Instead, we should keep an open mind to investing time into other hobbies, volunteering opportunities, or job training.
Regret Minimization
The 2nd framework that I’ve adopted, which would have helped me in high school and college, is Jeff Bezos’ concept of “regret minimization.” The goal is to imagine yourself in the future and picture an older version of yourself. Then ask yourself “would I regret doing this or not doing this?” The goal is to imagine yourself in the future, when you’re 80 years old, and think about what decisions you would regret the most.
Adopting this framework in college would have helped me switch from mechanical engineering to electrical engineering, even though I was 2 years into my current major. It would have allowed me to perhaps find a more enjoyable job aligned with my hobbies. However, having learned from my mistake, I used this framework to leave my stable job in Michigan to take a riskier job in California and to be closer to my family. Looking back on it, I am glad we decided to move to California.